On Losing the Battle against Resistance

Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash

Resistance is always lying and always full of shit ― Steven Pressfield

I was just reading the first few pages of the War of Art on my way home from work. I had a plan to go to a German Toastmaster meeting afterward, and i could feel the resistance was crawling in. Good thing that i was reading a book about resistance. I was prepared. I would not bow down. I would push through. I would definitely go to this event!

At least that was the plan. I got home rushing to make dinner as i wanted to come to the meeting on time. Dinner was ready, i ate super fast. Then 5 minutes before the time that i set myself to go, i heard a voice within me:

“Mia, it’s so cold outside, it’s better to stay in”. I said NO, let’s go!

“But Mia, it’s raining outside.” Yes but i have umbrella!

“But Mia, your German is still not so good to go to a German public speaking event.” My German is okay and i want to improve it.

“But Mia, what if they called you out to speak at the front, you know how this Toastmaster meeting always goes.” True, but i could prepare a bit.

Time to go!

“But Mia, if you take the train at this time, you will be late as you need to walk quite far to get to the event place.” Yeah i guess it’s okay if i come a bit late.

3 minutes passed the time i was supposed to leave.

“Mia, it’s too late now if you go, you are going to miss the train, you are going to show up late, it’s not good, this is Germany, you have to be on time” Yeah that is true i guess but i promised myself to go.

“But Mia, there’s always next week.” Yeah that is right.

And just like that, I was defeated. I did not end up going to the meeting. I felt so urgghhh. And this is not the first time that it happened. The only difference this time is that i was aware of the voice i heard. It was resistance and i didn’t do anything about it.

This is an ongoing battle and there’s no need to waste time and energy feeling mad at myself. I need to have a concrete plan to fight it more effectively.

And here’s my current plan:

  1. Being aware of the resistance when it starts to show up
  2. Acknowledge that the resistance is there
  3. Ask myself why i do this
  4. Just hit the buzzer! No more thinking or listening, just do it!

Breaking it down into a few small steps definitely makes it easier for me to follow. Now it’s time to put it into action. Resistance, here i come!

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